A New Servant of God

Tomorrow, 12 January, at 5:30 p.m. (4:30 p.m. GMT), Sister Clare Crockett’s cause of canonization is set to be opened in Madrid, and she is to be officially declared Serva Dei, Servant of God. As we noted in a previous post, she has become dear to the members of our community, and the signs of her intercession keep piling up. 12 January is also the birthday of one of the monks, a special birthday present to him.

11 January, 2013

As we considered what we could do to commemorate Sister Clare on Vultus Christi, we decided to search through her book to see if we could find some special significance to 12 January. Though we did not find any references to 12 January, an email from today (11 January) from 2013 caught our attention. It was written to Sister Clare’s spiritual father (as the book terms him), Father Rafael Alonso.

An Offering of Myrrh

Written just over three years before her death in an earthquake, this email speaks at length about the struggles that Sister Clare went through to make the offering of joy, despite inner sorrows. When the Magi offered Myrrh, it was a sign of the suffering and death of the Lord. Like the Magi on Epiphany, Sister Clare was called in the last years of her life to offer the myrrh of her participation in the sacrifice of the Lord on the Cross to make fruitful her ministry. Padre Pio once said that suffering is the currency of souls. It is through our union with Jesus in His Passion that souls are gained and won for Christ.

Like Padre Pio, Mother Teresa, Like Saint Thérèse

In suffering silently and inwardly a mental anguish hidden to those around her, Sister Clare joined the ranks of the great Saints of modern times. Padre Pio, Mother Teresa (whose advice Sister Clare strove to imitate), and her protector Saint, Saint Thérèse (along with many other Saints) were all known for their joy, but their joy hid an inner crucifixion. There was no lie in this, because they expressed the deeper truth by their smile, offering to Jesus to their arduous, unfelt, but nonetheless true joy. A smile is the alms of the poor.

Email from 11 January, 2013 to Father Rafael

Sister Clare’s Situation in Ecuador
“I have fit right in here. It’s not my merit, since it’s easy for me to adapt to new situations: whether it be with the rich in the United States, the poor in Ecuador, the sick and dying in Valencia, or the exceedingly lively girls in Belmonte. I really experience that any community is my home. Even so, I can’t help but be amazed at the poverty that they seem to want (‘want’ in the sense that the people here seem to have gotten used to living at a very low-level and they don’t want to get out of this situation). And there is not only a great material poverty, but also a moral and intellectual poverty as well. And in the midst of all of this, here I am. What for? To do God’s will and help Him save the souls of our Ecuadorian brothers.”

The Call to Unfelt Joy in Unseen Inner Darkness

“Another temptation that I am suffering (actually, I don’t know if it is a temptation or a purification, maybe you can help me understand this a little bit better) is sadness. Father, it’s funny that everyone, Sisters included, associate me with joy: ‘They are going to have a great time with Sr. Clare,’ ‘Sister, we always have a good laugh with you,’ ‘Sister, can you do Carlitos?’ (or any other silly thing that I do), ‘You transmit so much joy’… In all honesty, Father, and God alone knows, I feel so far from all of this and it is a true battle to remain joyful and give this joy [to others]. It’s something that God ALWAYS asks of me. I give you a few examples: after lunch He tells me, ‘Start a conversation, make a funny face, or tell a story that will make the Sisters smile’; in an activity we are doing with young people or adults, ‘Teach them a game, pick up the guitar, sing’; and so on and so forth: ‘Smile, say hello, talk.’”

Not Alone. Advice from a Kindred Soul.
“I read something by Segundo Llorente [1906-1989, Spanish Jesuit] that helped me a lot. The same thing happened to him. After receiving a letter from a woman who told him that he transmitted great joy, he wrote; ‘What she said about having a joyful spirit is very enlightening. Every once in a while I feel strangled by sadness and the days pass full of interior bitterness. When that happens, what I have to do is overcome the situation, throw myself into the Lord’s arms, let the world pass at a frightening speed, hum a song and wait until the storm passes.’”

The Devil is Eternally Sad
“I know that the devil is eternally sad and it is typical of the evil spirit to sadden, produce darkness in the soul, disturbance in it, movement to things low and earthly, unquiet with different agitations and temptations, moving to a want of confidence, without hope, without love, when one finds oneself all lazy, tepid, sad, and as if separated from one’s Creator and Lord, etc. However, I am at peace; I do not have a restless conscience, I go to Confession frequently, I try to obey and trust in God, I have a good relationship with the Sisters in my community. Why, then, this melancholy? Is it a trial from the Lord? Is it a purification? It is not something that I experience just now; I have had this interior burden for years. In these moments, doing something joyfully is truly difficult. Has this ever happened to you before?”

The Life of Man Upon Earth is a Warfare (Job 7:1)
“The devil does not leave me at peace. He wants to devour me at all costs… Job was right when he said, ‘The life of man upon earth is a warfare.’“

God’s Consolation
“As I tell you all of this, I also have to say that the Lord never stops consoling me and encouraging me. I don’t want you to think that I am here with a terrible depression. I laugh heartily and I still joke around as always. Not to mention that, when teaching the children, you always have to forget about yourself and try to be lively and do fun things to truly grab their attention, so that they can learn and be on fire for what is good and true.”

Long Live the Magnanimous Souls!
“Long live the magnanimous souls that seek only God’s glory.”

God Asks for Joy

Sister Clare received an inner conviction that God’s will for her was to be zealous for joy. She knew she had to make the effort to do this. She had to be joyful no other reason than because the Lord asked it of her, as she said in this same email: “It’s something that God ALWAYS asks of me.”